The moose changed everything: And was that a groundhog?

August 22, 2013

I was expecting life to be so much easier now that I was out of the mountains, but I was wrong. I thought, following a river, the road would be at least a little bit flat. But... I... was... wrong.

Basically, there were two roads through the valley, one which was flat where all the traffic was and where I wasn't allowed to cycle, and one which danced up and down the hillsides as much as it possibly could. I actually think I did more climbing than when I was going over the mountain passes, only it was a bit up, bit down, never ending, never getting anywhere. One time it even climbed about 500m. I was getting really frustrated. At least it was pretty.

The road went up the hillside because obviously it would be too sensible to build a road across that FLAT FIELD!

Then I met two German touring cyclists coming the other way. The use of the word 'German' is not really necessary, because every single touring cyclist I ever meet is from that country. From now on, I'll just say touring cyclist, and you can assume they are German. Anyway, they told me that the road ahead was closed due to a mud slide, and they had followed an awful diversion up tiny gravel roads for hours. It was lucky I met them, and I was able to plot another route on the other side of the river which, while naturally still involving plenty of climbing, was probably a lot better. Also, it was while I was on this road that I had a moment which completely improved my mood. I had just gone past a moose sign, which are very common everywhere here, but this time I suddenly sensed something large in the trees next to me. I looked quickly, but all I saw was the tree branches swaying as something big had just run away. 'Damn' I thought 'that was a moose. Bother and blast, that sure would have been cool to see.' And just as I was thinking this exact thing, on the road up ahead I saw a moose walk out from the trees and lope across the road into the woods on the other side. It was an absolutely ginormous creature, a big, beautiful animal. It made me very happy to see. My mood improved immensely. Life is wonderful and amazing sometimes.

And then, not long after that, the road flattened out and I even had a bike path that took me into Lillehammer and the hills were over. Lillehammer was a very nice town which is probably most famous for hosting the 1994 winter Olympics. I decided it would be worth taking the time to cycle up to the Olympic park before leaving town and camping in some woods.

This appears to be a statue of the strange viking man of the mountains that I met the day before, presumably to commemorate his double life as 'the evil child kidnapper on skis of Lillehammer'

To think, somebody flew off there and won gold once

Not long after I'd drifted off to sleep I was woken by noises outside. It sounded like a large animal brushing through the undergrowth and eating and I immediately imagined it must be a moose. I unzipped my tent and stuck my head out to look but it was too dark and the creature too far away. I listened for a while but soon fell back asleep.

Maybe an hour later I was awoken again, this time by a high-pitched squeaking from the trees the other side of my tent. I had no idea what animal it was but there appeared to be two of them talking, in short, sharp chirps that made me think of the noise that groundhogs make to alert each other of danger. I assumed it wasn't groundhogs, but the noise was really rather loud and annoying. Then, on the other side of me, another noise, much deeper and not at all like the others. It was coming from the direction that the 'moose' had been and it was definitely communicating with the squeaky chirps. I would hear a squeaky chirp and then a deep gurgly in instant response, repeated over and over every few seconds. I had my head out of the tent again but could see nothing. In my mind I was now imagining a moose and a groundhog having a chat across my tent like something out of a Pixar movie. What nonsense, I told myself, they must be the same species to be communicating like that. I decided that the squeaks must be coming from competing females and the deep gurgle from a male who, it very much seemed, was going to get lucky tonight. I really didn't know what animal it was though, such strange noises. I was just glad that I was in a country with no bears or alligators or anything else that might try and eat me. Confident in my position at the top of the food chain, I finally took matters into my own hands and stuck my head out of the tent.

"Would you lot shut the f:ck up! I am trying to get some sleep here! F:ck off!!!"

The mystery male voice grew gradually quieter as it crawled or slithered or bounced or loped away. I could actually hear the disappointment in its voice now. I never heard such a sad and solemn mystery voice in the night. Sorry bud, you ain't getting any tonight. The females kept on chattering away for a bit longer until I started throwing objects in their general direction and they got the message.

22/08/13 - 141 km

23/08/13 - 167 km

Today's ride: 308 km (191 miles)
Total: 3,748 km (2,328 miles)

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