BADLANDS NATIONAL PARK: Surviving Embarrassment After Embarrassment

September 1, 2017

The bike got loaded up one last time for a 10 mile trip to the Rapid City Regional Airport. Most of that ride was very flat and was boosted by a sweet 20-mile per hour tailwind. I pedaled effortlessly in my fasted gear. As a result, I made it to the airport exit well ahead of schedule.

From the airport sign shown above, it is only about 1/2-mile to the airport. That stretch of road went slightly uphill and, with my change in direction, the tailwind became a crosswind. Naturally, I shifted into an easier gear. That's when my drive train locked up. The chain was as tight as it could get and neither derailleur would budge. I couldn't shift up or down, nor could I move the chain with my hands. That's when I came to realize that my problem was a result of having to remove a couple of chain links back on the Mickelson Trail. I simply didn't have enough chain left to accommodate being on the largest chain ring and the second largest cog on the cassette.

The airport was so close! At first I thought I would just power up the hill in that gear, but the rear derailleur rattled so violently that I was afraid I'd break the chain again. I started walking my bike the last 1/2 mile, but that was too embarrassing. People passing me in their cars probably assumed I was too sissified to ride up that little hill.

Thanks to the combined forces of my huge brain, my embarrassment and my desperation, I came up with an idea: I could dig out my multi-tool and try to use the screwdriver to pry the chain from the bike's largest chain ring to the middle one. I knew I might break the chain or some other important part, but I had to try. And with quite a bit of effort . . . IT WORKED! I not only surprised myself with my ingenuity, but I was also able to continue riding to the airport with my pride intact.

The pride wasn't intact for long though. It took a couple more hits at the terminal. The first one came immediately upon arrival. After locking my bike to a signpost, I walked through the sliding doors with black greasy fingers and sweat dripping down my face. I proceeded directly to the restroom, where I tried to clean up as others looked on with a mix of sympathy, shock and disgust.

Next, I found the car rental area and got in line with all of the nicely-dressed airline passengers. I was wearing my cycling clothes and was still sweating, but at least my hands weren't nearly as black as they were a few minutes earlier.

"Hi," said the rental agent when my turn came up, "how can I help you?"

"Hi. I have a reservation for a one-way rental to Minneapolis. The name is Garceau."

The agent clicked and clicked on his keyboard and said, "I don't see anything under that name."

I spelled it for him, "G-A-R-C-E-A-U."

"I'm sorry, I just don't see it here," he said after some more typing.

"I made the reservation a few days ago," I insisted, "and I have a confirmation." I started to look it up on my phone when a supervisor stepped up.

"I can't find his reservation," said the agent to the supervisor.

"Are you sure you made the reservation with Hertz?" asked the supervisor, wisely.

"Huh?" I looked up and saw the sign above the counter. HERTZ I looked to my left and saw a sign above the next counter. ENTERPRISE

"Oh my," I said, "this is very embarrassing. I'm sorry."

"Hey, no problem," the supervisor replied.

Once I got to the correct car rental company, things went very smoothly and I was ready for the long drive home.

Buffalo Gap National Grassland. I really, really wished I was still riding my bike . . .

. . . because it would have been so much more exciting to come across this bunch of bighorn sheep while cycling.

I continued on into Badlands National Park, which would have been one of the highlights of my planned bike tour. Seeing the awesomeness of the scenery only made me feel worse about ending the tour early. The road snaked through the park, twisting and turning, up and down, past vista after vista after vista.

Then another brainstorm came to me: I could save a few shreds of dignity, and provide some legitimacy to including Badlands National Park as part of my bike tour, if I were to park the car and ride my bike for a while. And that's exactly what I did. I figured I could easily afford a couple of hours to ride my bike and still make it home by midnight.

"Let us out of here," shouted my cycling team!

What would a bike ride through the Badlands be without a selfie?

And without a chance for Nicycle to shine.

I stopped frequently to park my bike and hike around. In fact, nearly half of my biking time unexpectedly became hiking time. You can hike anywhere you want. There are some designated trails, but the best fun is making your own route straight into those fantastically eroded hills.

Aside from the inherent risk of hiking alone on unstable slopes, there are other dangers here as well.

There was one more thing I wanted to see before I left the Great Plains. I can't justify it with a bike ride, but I thought I'd display a couple of pictures from my visit to the National Minuteman Missile Historic Site. A few miles from here is where the military imploded the last of the Minuteman II missile silos after the Cold War ended.

I thought this place might be pretty interesting, and I was right.

My Coda: Great Plains AND Ground Zero--For Fun!

**************

In a couple of days I will evaluate my tour and wrap this thing up with a grand, sweeping conclusion. Thank you for reading my journal. And for those who didn't read every page, well, I don't WANT to have to sue anybody or send them to jail, but I do have to protect my rights. I issued a fair warning on the second page of this journal and my lawyer tells me that if I don't enforce it, readers might take advantage of me by only reading a page here and a page there. To avoid further legal action, you have one more opportunity to go back and read every single page--no matter how painful it gets. Thank you.

Today's ride: 22 miles (35 km)
Total: 659 miles (1,061 km)

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Bill ShaneyfeltIf I'd known, I would have skipped a page to test your lawyer...
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4 years ago

Gregory GarceauTo Bill ShaneyfeltBill, you do NOT want to test my lawyer. Sure, he is uncomfortable in a courtroom and usually settles out of court for much less than his clients are suing for. But on those rare occasions when he doesn't lose his nerve, he has prevailed in more than 10% of his cases in front of an actual jury.

Thanks for reading every page.
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4 years ago