If I were an engine

January 26, 2022

What sort would I be?

IN THIS MORNING'S SPIN I fell to contemplating how my physiology compares to various mechanical engines. Since forever I've been a "grinder" on a bike, rather than a "spinner". A cadence of 50 to 65 rpm is much more comfortable to me than one of 80 or above.

It comes down to oxygen, I think: I'm built with lots more slow-twitch muscle than fast-twitch. Although it's never been measured I'd hazard a guess that my oxygen uptake rate is only in the average range, at best. Certainly, once I get winded I gasp and wheeze until the load is eased, generally by a reduction in spin rate although a drop in gear is also often necessary for me to switch from above-aerobic to recovery level consumption.

So, I got to thinking about it in terms of various vehicles. I'm definitely not the sort of engine (okay, technically this has a "motor" not an "engine") that powers this:

Tesla "Space-X" Roadster. Not me. Although I'd love to have one.

Probably not this either. Oh hell, there's no "probably" about it.

Ferrari SF-90 Strada. High-revving, high-horsepower, sleek and exotic. Drinks premium fuel in quantity. That last is the only thing we have in common.

And no I'm neither Marc Marquez nor a MotoGP racing motorcycle. They are incredibly fast and agile. Unlike me.

Repsol Honda MotoGP race bike. Redlines around 12,000 or 13,000 RPM, maximum power at 9,000-11,000. I wish.

Okay let's consider alternatives that begin to reflect some of my "performance" metrics. Best performance at relatively slow engine speeds. More stamina than sprint, and more "low-end 'grunt' " than other types. Not built for bursts of high speed, but for all-day labor.

A Mack truck. Getting closer to home but probably still not the right analog although I'm definitely closer to a diesel than a high-octane race engine.

The ever-popular deuce-and-a-half. Rugged, reliable, powerful but slow, runs on almost anything. Definitely getting closer to my neighborhood.

Loads of torque and power at very low RPM. Prone to excessive emissions. Seems familiar.

Getting very close now. BIG power, BIG weight. Not particularly visually appealing except to a dedicated few.

Other similarities exist between this loco and me: although powerful they were quite slow, and like all locomotives they don't do well on steep grades.

In the end, I think this is probably the closest analog.

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