D24: 高阳 → 定州 (双语）

October 19, 2024

So dang close to 100km, but—even with some judicious detours near the end—short of breaking my self-imposed rules and actually riding in circles, I couldn't quite manage a way to push my final distance up to a full metric century.

While yesterday's drizzly rest day certainly contributed to my having the necessary energy, a large part of how I was able to get so much distance done today is because the North China Plain is very flat and very prone to very straight roads; a larger part of it is because the roads and their surroundings had absolutely nothing that attracted me to go wandering off in search of reasons to stop and look.

差一点就到100公里了，即便最后明智地绕了些路，除非打破自己定的规矩去骑圈，否则实在没办法把最终里程凑成整整100公里。

虽说昨天阴雨休息天确实让我攒了些体力，但今天能骑这么远，很大程度上得益于华北平原一马平川，道路笔直；更大的原因是，沿途实在没什么能吸引我驻足观望的东西。

Even knowing that I must have done this road before on the way from Baoding to Anguo on both the 2012 and 2018 rides¹, and knowing that there was a historic stone bridge accidentally found both times when I was looking for a secluded spot to stretch my legs², I can't find anything worth stopping for.

明明记得2012年和2018年骑行时，从保定去安国的路上肯定走过这段路¹，也记得当时有两次想找个隐蔽地方伸展一下，都意外发现了一座古石桥²，但此刻就是找不到任何值得停留的理由。

Slightly larger pump with aboveground storage tank for the crude oil 略大些的泵，地上有储存原油的罐

Although, unlike the roads from Xiong'an (which were actively, mind-numbingly boring), today's roads aren't unattractive boulevards lined with ticky-tacky construction or anything like that, they just don't have much of anything that's exciting for more than a snapshot or three. Even in terms of photos, there isn't much beyond some martyr's graves from the War of Resistance Against Japanese Aggression, a memorial for everyone from this village who died during the Mission to Provide Assistance to Our Korean Comrades in Resisting American Imperialism, and a hotel named Marriott that I almost convince myself to stay in.

Over the next couple of days, I'll have plenty of excuse for why I don't make any videos. On this day, however, although I'm enjoying my music and cranking out the kilometers, there just isn't anything exciting or anything that creative attempts to film can make look exciting.

虽说今天的路不像雄安的路（无聊得让人麻木），没有千篇一律的廉价建筑排成毫无吸引力的大道，但除了拍两三张快照外，实在没什么让人兴奋的东西。就连拍照素材，也不过是一些抗战烈士墓、村里抗美援朝牺牲者的纪念碑，以及一家让我差点说服自己入住的“万豪”酒店。

接下来几天，我有充分的理由不拍视频。但今天，尽管听着音乐、不停踩蹬里程，却实在没什么有意思的事，就算强行创意拍摄，也很难让画面生动起来。

A lot of today's photos were comparing the differences in door architecture from one village to the next 今天很多照片在对比不同村庄的门的建筑风格

Nearly every house in one village would be one style 一个村子里几乎每家都是同一种风格

Sometimes, though, you would get a bit of a mix such as this entryway which is both a plain green metal door and a large block of calligraphy tiles 有时也会看到混搭风，比如这个入口，既有普通的绿色金属门，又有一大块书法瓷砖

And then, the next village, would be a different style altogether 然后下一个村子，又完全是另一种风格

Things start getting better once I'm in Dingzhou. Although Dr. M's colleague has literally just left for Shijiazhuang, he sends me a photo of a seal script calligraphy made for me in his own handwriting³, and puts me in contact with the Dingzhou Municipal Comprehensive Media Center.

到定州后情况开始好转。M博士的同事虽然刚去石家庄，他不但给我发了一张他亲手为我写的篆书³，也帮我联系了定州市融媒体中心。

A fully loaded motor trike honks and waves as they pass me, calls out my name as I pass them, and ends up giving me a bag of fresh picked hawthorn⁴. The hotel I've randomly picked for the night is one that has a bathhouse and, for 110 yuan of upselling me to different body lotions and close to an hour of deep tissue massage, I luxuriate in the process of Being Attacked by an Elderly Woman With a Loofah⁵.

Considering that I'd already spent a good 15 minutes in the shower with my own loofah before the Great Loofahing, and had thought that I was already quite thoroughly clean, it was really quite impressive just how much dead skin and other junk she scrubbed off of me.

一辆满载的三轮摩托车经过时按喇叭跟我挥手，等我骑过他们身边，居然喊出我的名字，最后还塞给我一袋新鲜山楂⁴。随便挑的酒店居然带澡堂，花110元加购各种身体乳，享受了近一小时深层按摩——确切地说，是被一位拿丝瓜瓤的老奶奶“粗暴对待”了⁵。

虽说在“丝瓜瓤大战”前，我已经用自己的搓澡巾在淋浴间搓了15分钟，自认已经很干净了，但老奶奶搓下来的死皮和污垢之多，还是让我震惊。

I feel that the gray bricks are insufficiently weathered to be 18th or earlier 感觉灰砖风化程度不够，不像18世纪或更早的

¹ And, lest one think that this is malaise creeping in, I found the North China Plain equally boring at the start, middle, or end of this and every other Tour that has crossed Hebei.

¹ 别以为我是情绪低落，每次穿越河北的骑行中，华北平原从始至终都无聊得一成不变。

² Translation: take a shit

² 直译：上厕所

³ Getting a calligraphy made for you in someone's handwriting is a culturally significant gift. Especially when that someone is an expert in the particular kind of handwriting that they've made it for you in.

³ 请人亲手题字是很有文化意义的礼物，尤其是对方还是该字体领域的专家。

⁴ They're really too sour to eat without processing so I end up giving them to the owner of my hotel.

⁴ 太酸了，不加工根本没法吃，后来送给了酒店老板。

I really want someone to explain to me why early 00s China liked decorating with giant mushroom statues 真想有人解释下，为什么21世纪初的中国喜欢用巨型蘑菇雕塑做装饰

When deciding to leave the main road for a while, my efforts at pushing myself up to 100km for the day were helped by trying to avoid puddles 决定暂时离开主路的一次，我为了避开水坑能帮我向单日100公里努力了一把

⁵ During the Andrew the Coffee Guy years†, it was discovered that the Korean spa he liked to go to in Haikou also offered the loofahing service, provided in private rooms by people that were wearing clothing. However, all three‡ of the times that I've had the fortune of ending up at a northern Chinese bathhouse that offers it, everything was all out there in the open.

⁵ 在“咖啡大师”时代†，发现他在海口常去的韩式汗蒸馆也提供搓澡服务，而且是在私人房间里由穿衣服的人服务。但我有幸体验过的三次‡中国北方澡堂搓澡，全都是在大庭广众之下进行的。

† Unfortunately coming to China about five years too early to succeed, Andrew the Coffee Guy is an Australian specialty coffee roaster who was trying to break in to the Chinese market. As both of us had a lot of "hurry up and wait" type dead time on our hands, and he had a higher level and more expensive lifestyle than I, our deal was that, instead of paying me for specific translation tasks, he'd pay for all my coffee and food and entertainment when hanging out with him in Haikou and I'd be fully on call available for any translation he needed.

† 可惜早来中国五年，没赶上好时候。咖啡大师安德鲁是澳大利亚精品咖啡烘焙师，曾试图打入中国市场。我们俩都有大把“急急忙忙却只能等待”的闲置时间，而他生活水平更高、消费更贵，所以我们约定：他不用为具体翻译任务付钱，只要在海口跟他一起时帮我付咖啡、餐饮和娱乐费用，我则随时待命帮他翻译。

‡ Anhui 2008, Baoding 2012, and this time

‡ 2008年安徽，2012年保定，还有这次